Saturday, 13 June 2009

When life throws you lemons

There are bitter experiences in every man's life. You can duck and dive from these as the smooth road sometimes gets bumpy and you meander into stife and grief. You can either make lemonade with the lemons thrown at you or you could bite that lemon and down it with a shot of tequila.

I believe my life is written, God knows me more than i know myself. Sometimes i fight with Him because the tests can be overwhelming but always they are worth the lesson learnt after the breakthrough.... OOooohhhh i'm oozing with excitement right now... Feeling wholesome with the negative and the positive, its a piece of the full beautiful picture...

I got my angels surrounding me and i can feel theirs halo's which never fade away. Shining in my life and hitting me like the rays of sun... The past 4 years of my life have flown by and my angels been watching over me. I still feel 20 and its shocking that i'm becoming more of a grown ass woman at a faster pace. My brother is my rock in my life... He guarded, provided and loved me since my dad died at 13 and i feared failing to live up to his high expectations and hopes for my life. I had nuff respect for him, still do but damn! he drummed lectures into my teenage mind. Now that i speak to him it seems the lectures have finally stopped - all he says is that i should pursue happiness above everything else i want to achieve in my life. Its very important to chase after the right things in life and making that decision can change your future. You can spend time worrying, complaining or wearing a mask and sacrifice your happiness BUT i say HEYYYYY!!! Wake the hell up and choose happiness no matter whats thrown in your path!

Happiness is not something you have in your hands, its something you have in your heart... so people, keep a happy heart - not angry, not needy and definately not greedy...

Wednesday, 29 April 2009

This heart, this heart of mine confuses the heck out of me. I listen to it and it comes up with mixed messages. Apparently it fears getting hurt. Sometimes it shuts up when i'm content with what its saying, and we've had our ups & downs. Me and my heart, sometimes we have issues, lol... But we depend on each other and it gives me joy that my heart works....

My mind, this mind of mine it going round and round in circles. I listen to it but its seems to be short of information. Sometimes its a good source of comfort and then it tends to procrastinate. When i fill it with my Fathers word it gains clarity

Growing up with this heart and this mind has been quite a journey, interesting one indeed. Life has been all about schooling and still i learn. My Father says that i'll perish for lack of knowledge. Together my mind and heart make decisions, sometimes they feel like mistakes and yet i know that its all for a purpose. Yes, team work heart + mind is best and everything conspires towards a destiny. I am definitely a woman of destiny. I dont walk blindly, nor talk recklessly even though there've been moments i once wanted to change, i realise that those moments bring me to the moment i'm in now so how dare i regret!

I talk to God like he's my Father and Friend. My advisor, my comforter, my reason of being. Yet, i 've never seen him, i believe in him and he's holding my hand right now. He said to me the other day, baby girl don't worry - trust in me and i will not lead you astray. Picture yourself driving a long distance journey at night, without street lights. You cannot see whats far ahead but the car lights guide you, and show u little by little what is ahead and you just continue step by step until you reach your final destination, you will be proud of what i have prepared for your home coming. The work you're here to do, you'll do it gracefully and full of love. Quit listening to what people have to say and follow me.

So with this heart and this mind, i know that i am on the right path and that gives me peace. You just have to forget whats behind and not worry about whats ahead, live with hope and make sure you live intensely in each moment.

As a kid, i was absolutely fearless - i trusted in my heart because it was pure (i think, lol). Never feared the dark, not even snakes and i trusted God with my all. I lived right in the moment dreaming of a big future. Distractions and awareness of evil in the world caused my heart to fear and my mind to wonder. I'm casting out all the negative experiences that taught my heart to fear and relearning how to live with abundant faith. I trust all is well xxx One love

Wednesday, 11 February 2009

Hello Blogville

I dunno what i'm doing on this space, Gotta "Fess Up" and admit i've been an invisible stalker checking out other peeps blogs - sometimes getting an insight on random situations and other times having a right laugh at the different types of crazy around the world.. So today, "go figure" - i got me a plot of land in blogger world and i shall build a lil home, which hopefully I'll settle in and call my sweet escape, make friends and live happily ever after, lol. For me, writing is a hobby, a source of therapy in a strange way, an expression of joy at other times and then again i can put together a bunch of sh*t coz i have a mind that works in weird ways ...

So people have called me many things such as; crazy, weird, sweet, sensual, crazy, deep, ignorant, intelligent, pain in the backside, crazy, kind, fun-loving, perv and the list goes on... U did notice crazy, right? Ignore that! Its total BS! I am so idealistic and full of dreams its almost sickening but i've come to terms with it so whoever reads this just has to put up with it too. Im a big believer in the Big man above and damn optimistic even when its so clear the odds are against you. (some call that insanity) but hey..... its worked for me many times! I'll be the friend who's calm in a storm, laugh when we've messed up big time as long as there's someones hand to hold, anyones' hand will do! I used to live with a raging storm within me (like a born worrier does) but life, God and I have worked together to keep it calm & peaceful... and I'm so in love with myself these days... l8rs!! Keep it Hundreds!!!